The Malaysian Repository

Mari kecek

2011-02-28T22:05:00.000-08:00

'Yang kurik itu kundi,
yang merah itu saga,
yang molek itu budi,
yang indah itu bahasa'

Yezza...sememangnya, bahasa itu melambangkan identiti kita dan kita sedia maklum yang Bahasa Malaysia ini berbilang dialeknya. Antara dialek unik di mana kebanyakan orang Msia mendengarnya dah pasti boleh kenal ialah dialek Kelate. Dialek Kelate ini digunakan oleh mereka yang berasal dari Kelantan atau yang tinggal di Kelantan. Mereka yang tinggal di daerah sempadan Kelantan/Pahang, Kelantan/Terengganu dan juga di daerah2 di selatan Thai seperti Narathiwat, Yala dan Patani juga menggunakan variasi dialek ini.

Pasar Besar Siti Khadijah, Kota Bharu

Terdapat banyak perbezaan di antara bahasa baku dan dialek Kelate nih dari segi ayat, fonologi, morfologi dan leksikal. Mari kita lihat beberapa contoh perkataan dan frasa di bawah.

Hare = Haram
Bekwoh = Kenduri
Mokte = Rambutan
Ukah = Panjat
Kekoh = Gigit
Kakoh Aye = Rangka Ayam
Blana kokna = Amat banyak
Punoh Jahne = Rosak
Kona Lepa = Corner Lipat
Koho = Perlahan
Kupik hangik = Kedekut nak mampus
Jabir = Beg plastik
Jolo = Betul

Yaaaa....berpotensi untuk membuat kepala meletup

Pic credits to Trek Earth and juliansanchez.com.
Klate words credited to my Klate language tutor.

Bosan

2010-10-25T19:23:00.001-07:00

Dah lama tak update blog. Busy + lack of ideas.

Currently, this blog only serves the purpose of being a one-stop page where I can see updates in my usual reads.

How NOT to board an aid flotilla

2010-06-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

Aid Flotilla FTW!

Pic taken from Center for a New American Security

2010

2010-01-04T00:30:00.000-08:00

Happy new year!

As per common practice, resolutions and wishlists are made for the new year. I am not normally the type of person who would draft resolutions to be achieved but I'll jump on the bandwagon for this one time.

2010 Resolutions:

Reduce procrastination and increase productivity

Try to show up at the mosque a bit more often

Learn a new language or brush up on Arabic

2010 Wishlist:

Nikon AF-S DX Zoom-Nikkor 18-200mm F3.5-5.6G IF-ED VR II

Priced at a whopping RM2700+, this versatile lens will make me think, reconsider, think and reconsider again before I eventually decide to part with the money. However, the lens perform remarkably well for zoom and wide angle shots making it very appealing for the non-professional photographers who do not feel like getting a superzoom in the mould of the 70-300mm.
Probability of procurement: 75%

Nikon SB-900 Speedlight

Successor to the SB-800, this neat addition will set me back by RM1600+. It will however complement well with the 18-200 lens above.
Probability of procurement: 60%

VForce Grill Mask

Fogging during a paintball game is pretty damn annoying. One solution would be the VForce Grill, one of the more awesome looking paintball masks in the market. Plus, cases of fogging for this mask is very rare. This will set me back by RM300+.
Probability of procurement: 95%

PS3 Slim

Wanted to get a PS3 ever since playing COD: Modern Warfare 2 at a friend's place. The graphics were life-like and the gameplay mesmerizing. However, I am rarely at home nowadays and with a PS3 priced at RM1200+, a PS3 acquisition seems kinda low in my priority list. Probability of procurement: 10%

What would you do if...

2009-09-11T02:57:00.001-07:00

It's been a long time since I penned a piece here. Thought of resuming after Raya but I am considering this one bizarre incident as a sign that I must blog today. Thus, I will begin with this long hypothetical question.

Location: Public Restroom, Lift Lobby 1, Level 3, TPM

Sekadar Gambar hiasan

What would you do if you were standing at an elevated position in your toilet cubicle and then you peeked into the adjacent cubicle only to find the person next door is aware and staring back at you?

According to the social norm for the community of public toilet creeps and weirdos, the answer is apparently:

Immediately apologise upon being noticed
Flush in a rush (hey, it rhymes)
Leave cubicle in hurry

People nowadays are so unpredictable (or a more suitable word would be weird/creepy).

Haha, in case some of you are thinking 'Sejak bila Amir jadi peeping tom nih?', 'Tau r Amir tu keji tapi dia pervert ker?'...I will clarify further.

On Friday (11/9/2009) at 4.50pm, as I was leaving work, I stopped by the restroom. I went inside one of the cubicles. The time was still early so I took my time. I checked out the toilet paper rolls, looked at the ceiling idly, checked out the cubicle partition down and up...and THAT was when I noticed something out of place. I saw a patch of hair on a head rising out from the next cubicle. Then a pair of eyes followed. He made eye contact with me and his eyes widened in shock. I casually said 'Woi'.
Without delay, he apologized saying 'Sorry'. Then, I heard the sound of flushing and someone scurrying out of the cubicle in a hurry. I found the episode rather amusing.
Heh, I can still afford to find this funny(in a weird sense) because when he peeked over, I was fully dressed and not in a compromising situation. My honor/water face/dignity remains intact. I can still laugh about it.

Plot holes that still baffle me:

Shouldn't he be peeping in the female toilet? I won't speculate further on this because the potential answer may haunt me in my sleep.

Shouldn't one flush prior to the process of peeping? In this way, at least the odour will be more tolerable if you wanna peep for a long time.

Weirdo rating:
7/10

Michael Owen is a Red Devil

2009-07-04T01:18:00.000-07:00

It's official. Michael Owen has signed for Manchester United. SAF has long been an admirer of Owen. He wanted to sign him in 2005 but was unwilling to pay the GBP 16.5mil demanded by Real Madrid. SAF gets him for free now.
Is this good news for MU fans around the world?

Pros:

Owen is free
Relatively low wage compared with other MU players
Impressive track record for club and country
Great understanding and interplay with Wayne Rooney for England
Adds more attacking options for SAF after departure of CR7 and Carlos Tevez

Cons:

Injury-prone
Inconsistent form
Lost a bit of his pace over the years

Well, I reckon SAF needs to get another striker. Honourable mentions include Pato, Torres, Huntelaar and Ibrahimovic. Happy hunting!

Pic taken from Soccernet and Daylife

There's something about HINDRAF

2009-06-21T23:35:00.000-07:00

Why do politicians like to twist facts and stir up racial sentiments? Many answers exist for that and can be debatable but what can't be denied is that both sides of the political divide are actually guilty of this flaw. None can take the moral high ground. Seeing this report by Hindraf makes me have the urge to do some mythbusting. These people ought to have carefully researched their 'findings' before publishing them for all the world to see. Some of their points are just so messed up that anyone with common sense and some grey matter can see through them as blatant lies. I'll just highlight 7 points in memory of Manchester United's no. 7, Cristiano Ronaldo who will be moving to Real Madrid (only an act of God can stop him now).
Sighs...why, why, why does DS Anwar Ibrahim support them so relentlessly knowing that they distort their stories?

Excerpts from the report:

1. Kampong Medan “Ethnic Cleansing” of Indians (2001) – 5 Indians killed and a hundred over suffered grevious bodily injuries.
Hindraf places the burden of guilt solely on UMNO and PDRM claiming it was a plan to massacre the Indians in the area. This is just ludicrous. The Kampong Medan incident actually started off with something less sinister than what they have been propagating. This is what Malaysiakini's report had to say about it:

"The whole episode supposedly started with an Indian security guard returning from work at 3am on March 4.

He found a tent erected for a wedding in the middle of the narrow road in Kampung Medan. He grew agitated and started kicking the tables and chairs.

This angered the Malay family that was preparing for the wedding, who rushed out and assaulted him. He fled but returned later with a parang and five other cohorts.

A fight broke out and at one point, the security guard fled to a nearby house, belonging to an Indian family, where a funeral wake was being held..

The group of Malays, who assumed he was a member of the household, then set fire to a car and two motorcycles parked nearby.

This marked the beginning of the bloody clashes, which was further aggravated when an Indian boy, using a slingshot, smashed the windscreen of his neighbour's vehicle.

The angry van owner, an Indian, sought compensation from the children's parents. He was joined by his driver, a Malay, but some villagers who saw the commotion thought that a Malay was threatening the Indians. Rumours began to spread and the rest is history."

2. One Hindu Temple is demolished in every week nation wide in Malaysia.

Mosques and temples have also been demolished. Some of these cases are where the structure didn't have the appropriate licence. Harakah has highlighted cases of mosques and suraus being demolisehd in the past. This should not be turned into a racial issue.

3. 90% of the deaths in police and prison custody victims are Indians.

This is not simply not true. Malays make up the majority of people who died in custody.

"Out of the total 1,583 prisoner fatalities, 1,425 were Malaysians, comprising Malays 898, Chinese 271, Indians 224 and Others 32. The balance of 158 deaths were foreigners, comprising Indonesia 62, Philippines 11, Thailand 43, India 7, Bangladesh 2, China 1 and Others 32."

4. Indians today earn as low as RM13.00 (USD 3.50) per day as plantation Workers.

Chinese/Malay plantation workers also earn roughly the same amount per day.

5. Foreign medical college Degrees from Ukraine, Russia, Romania, India and Indonesia with almost all Malaysian Indian private students suddenly were derecognized by the Malaysian government.

This has nothing to do with race. Many non-Indian students were enrolled in these universities and were affected as well.

6. Government PTPTN study loans and scholarships denied to Indians studying medicine, law, engineering etc in overseas.

People, PTPTN does not offer loans for study in overseas.

"The PTPTN Education Loan Scheme was set up with the aim of providing education loans to students pursuing their studies in local institutions of higher learning (IPT).
This loan will enable students to fully or partially pay their fees and their subsistence for the duration of their study in the IPT. Thus, this scheme provides greater opportunities to students to continue their tertiary education.

The scope of the PTPTN education loan facility is open to students pursuing studies at the diploma, first degree, master, doctorate and professional courses levels in IPTs established under the following acts:

Universities and Universities Colleges Act 1971
Institut Teknologi MARA Act 1976
Private Higher Education Institutions Act 1996
Education Act 1996 "

7. Almost all the above Tamil schools are all in cowshed like pre war structures.

Do you honestly believe this statement???

References

Hindraf Report
Remembering Kampung Medan: one year after (Malaysiakini)
358 "judicial hangings" from 1980 to Sept. 2004 (DAPMalaysia)
PTPTN - Loans

Silat in Malaysia (Pt. 1)

2009-06-09T20:08:00.000-07:00

As there are tonnes of football clubs in England (from Man United to Kettering Town), there are also hundreds of Silat styles in Malaysia. Similar to the BPL, the Silat community in Malaysia would also have its own Big Four. These four are the Pertubuhan Seni Silat Gayong Malaysia (PSSGM), Pertubuhan Seni Silat Lincah Malaysia (PSSLM), Pertubuhan Seni Gayung Fatani Malaysia(PSGFM) and Pertubuhan Seni Silat Cekak Malaysia(PSSCM). These four groups commands the lion's share of penetration in teaching at primary, secondary and tertiary institues of education.
In addition to the Big Four, we also have a lot of Evertons and Aston Villas of Silat like Pertubuhan Silat Kegayongan (Acheh) Helang Putih (PSK(A)HP), Istiadat Pewaris Penjurit-Kepetangan Melayu (IPPM), Persatuan Seni Silat Kuntau Tekpi Malaysia (PSSKTM) and Pertubuhan Seni Silat Sendeng Malaysia (PSSSM).

Let's begin with Gayong Malaysia. This is probably the most famous Silat style in Malaysia. Whenever a person unfamiliar with Silat knows I learn Silat, he will ask whether I learn Gayong. Ermm...there are hundreds of Silat styles in Malaysia alone, people.

Well, luckily since the Silat documentary disaster (read as Human Weapon), these people have expanded their vocabularies. Now their question is more like

'You learn Gayong, Harimau, Lok 9 or Lian Padukan?'

Well, at least that's still an improvement.

PSSGM has a long and proud history. It is the first martial arts association to be registered in Malaysia. It was founded by the legendary Dato' Meor Abdul Rahman (pic). The art covers unarmed combat as well as use of traditional Malay weapons.

The syllabus roughly comprises:

Tapak Gayong (foundation, teaches fighting stances, basic blocks and parries)
Seni Tapak Gayong (advanced form of the foundation)
Seni Keris (techniques using small weapons i.e. knife and keris (traditional Malay dagger)
Seni Simbat (techniques using long weapons i.e. spear, staff, machete)
Seni Yoi (employs trickery and craft, advanced fighting techniques and tips)
Seni Cindai (technique using a woman's headscarf, belt, etc.)
Seni Belian (spiritual)

Majid Mat Isa demonstrating a Cindai technique

Even though PSSGM is larger and more established, the individual Masters in the sister organization, Pertubuhan Seni Silat Pusaka Gayong Malaysia (PSSPGM) are more famous. PSSPGM has more household names like Majid Mat Isa and Awang Daud as compared to PSSGM.
For more information on the art, go to the Gayong portal.

Awang Daud

Crap...am getting dizzy with all these acronyms.

Picture Credits
Pusaka Gayong
Persatuan Seni Silat Pusaka Gayong Malaysia UM
Promninence world of Penjurit-Kepetangan

Wishlist for 2009/10 Season (Manchester United)

2009-06-03T20:02:00.000-07:00

Season's over with the conclusion of the FA Cup. Man Utd did ok for the season, I guess. Winning the Club World Cup, Community Shield, Carling Cup and Premier League can be considered as a good season already. These are players I hope Man Utd will have playing for them next season (of course, it will not happen but it's ok to dream once in a while).

Iker Casillas (Real Madrid, Goalkeeper)
Birth Place: Madrid, Spain
Height: 1.85m
Age: 28 (1981)

Iker is in top 3 for best goalie in the world in my books. He is Real Madrid's saviour in many games. The opposition's attacking force have to be really good to breach the post when San Iker is on form. His commanding of the defence may be open to criticism but his agility and shot-stopping is still one of the best. Real Madrid would have conceded 7-8 goals that day at Anfield if it weren't for Iker. With Van der Sar leaving and Ben Foster still not ready yet, Iker would be a good choice between the sticks.

Honourable mentions: Gianluigi Buffon (Juventus), Julio Cesar (Inter Milan)

Michael Essien (Chelsea, Midfielder)
Birth Place: Accra, Ghana
Height: 1.80m
Age: 26 (1982)

This guy is a steamroller in midfield. He is a very physical player, powerful and plays with a lot of energy. He kept Stevie G out of the game and in his pocket during the first leg of CL at Anfield. He is also a versatile player. He can perform the Makelele role, support the attack as well as play rightback.The only ones MU have at the moment that comes close to him is Owen Hargreaves (recovering from long-term injury) and Darren Fletcher (not as aggressive as Essien).

Honourable mentions: Gennaro Gattuso (AC Milan), Lasssana Diarra (Real Madrid)

Steven Gerrard (Liverpool, Midfielder)
Birth Place: Whiston, Merseyside
Height: 1.85m
Age: 29 (1980)

Hailed by some to be the best midfielder in the world. I find him to be a complete footballer. He has good vision when attacking and he tracks back to help defend. He's got speed, intensity and he is the main force behind LFC's title chase in 2008/09 (it wasn't Torres). His talismanic character was highlighted during the CL final in Istanbul where he scored the first of Liverpool's(against the run of play?) goals which turned the game on its head. He also scored the last-minute thunderbolt against West Ham in the FA Cup Final the next season. He can walk into the first XI of any team at the moment.

Honourable mentions: Frank Lampard (Chelsea), Rafael Van der Vaart (Real Madrid), Andres Iniesta (Barcelona)

Image Credits
Telegraph UK
The Sun UK
BBC UK

Silat vs. Hapkido

2009-06-02T19:13:00.000-07:00

Picture Credits

Wikipedia
Penjuritan

"I have not failed 700 times, I have not failed once. I have succeeded in proving those 700 ways will not work. When I have eliminated the ways that will not work, I will find the way that will work"
~ Thomas Edison

Aku seorang ahli politik...

2009-05-27T00:57:00.001-07:00

Kata2 ku telah diputar seperti mana ucapan Nik Aziz/Dr. M kena putar (spin)/quoted out of context....Haha, takpe. Kita lihat jer lah 31hb nanti.

Hypocrisy

2009-05-24T23:33:00.000-07:00

Hypocrisy [hi-pok-ruh-see]

–noun, plural -sies.
1. a pretense of having a virtuous character, moral or religious beliefs or principles, etc., that one does not really possess.
2. a pretense of having some desirable or publicly approved attitude.
3. an act or instance of hypocrisy.

Yes, hypocrisy a.k.a nifaq. This is a trait that people in my previous entry would definitely possess. Degree of hypocrisy differs from person to person and the severity of the misdeed, of course. He can be an ustaz who gives ceramah and lectures that cleanliness is important in Islam but won't try to keep the public toilet clean and presentable after using it. She can be a mother who lectures her son (who just got his driving license) not to drive recklessly but may just turn out to be the one behind the wheel of the white Suzuki Swift tailgating me at 120 km/h at TTDI Plaza last week. She can also be a primary school teacher who teaches her kids to line up and queue at the canteen but she may also be the one who cut my queue while buying popia basah at the pasar malam last Sunday.
Hypocrites are all around us. I admit I am also hypocritical at times but hey, at least I am aware of it and I don't try to boast an Islamic, high and mighty image of myself. There are too many instances of hypocrisy in this world. I'll just highlight three annoying ones for today.

Female hosts on Astro Oasis

If any of you are not familiar with it (memang frog under coconut shell r korang nih), Oasis is the Islamic-themed channel provided by Astro. The tiff I have with this channel is that the hosts are obligated to wear tudung and at the same time, Astro wants to capitalise on the popularity of the products of their famed Akademi Fantasia(AF). Examples that come to mind include Farah AF2 of Rasa Halal Orient and Noni AF5 in Cafe Akhil Hayy.

Farah AF2

So you end up watching Farah talking about halal food in Taiwan (Rasa Halal Orient), ad comes in, you change the channel to Astro Ria...she is there tudung-less dancing and singing. This entry is not made to condemn the dancing/singing but the selection practice of Astro.In the end, the tudung is consigned to being just another fashion accessory that can be taken on and off, and its religious standing is compromised. The AF stars like Farah and Noni are then labelled by munafiq/hypocrites by some.
Why not just hire hosts that wear tudung fulltime? These people might not be as popular but since most of the viewers of Astro Oasis are the religious, "thou shall not watch AF" type...it probably wouldn't matter much to them.

Vernacular Schools vs National Schools (One school concept)

Annoying. I reserve this for some of Malaysia Today's (MT) commentators. They argue that there is not enough integration between the races in Malaysia. They call for a united Malaysian Malaysia where people should identify themselves as Malaysians and not whether you are Malay, Indian or Chinese.
And then when a person proposes to abolish vernacular schools and everyone should go to only one type of school, these people get into a frenzy saying it is their constitutional right to have vernacular schools. They start citing Penyata Razak, Penyata Rahman Talib and whatnot. Whatever happened to the spirit of not being racial and just be Malaysian that they were championing? These commentators who went berserk would start acting childish, call people names and spew out vitriolic racist remarks. Cool Down!
Children start socialising at primary school level or lower. Hence, having a one school system is one of many ways to have them mingle together at a young and impressionable age. If one objects to the said proposal, just point out your agruments in a civilised manner. No need to get into a fit.

Comparing Malaysia to Singapore

This is also a popular theme among many MT commentators. They always cite Singapore as their utopia and model nation for Malaysia.

'Singapore is heaven.'
'Singapore has no corruption.'
'Dr M will never measure up to LKY.'
'Singapore has no racism.'

Erkkk, this is selective myopia at its worst. Crap, this is even worse than Arsenal's Arsene Wenger. It can't be denied that Singapore has a stronger economy than Malaysia but these commentators conveniently leave out certain facts. The truth is Singapore's media restrictions are more rigid and strict compared to Malaysia. Their media is state-controlled and regulated.
The opposition is also curtailed in many ways by methods of voters/territory splitting, libel suits and whatnot. If you want stats, Malaysia is ranked at 81 while Singapore is worse off at 84 in The Economist's Democracy Index. Racism, corruption and abuse of power do occur in Singapore. I won't elaborate on this matter. You can read more/find stats from the links given. In particular, the one from Rocky Bru is worthy of 10 minutes of your time. The gist is...selective myopia is a form of hypocrisy. Malaysia and Singapore have more in common than you think.

Singapore Election Watch (blog)
Secret Political Blog
List of indices of Freedom (wikipedia)
Article in Rocky Bru
Article in Online Citizen

References:

Dictionary.com: Hypocrisy
Dasar Pendidikan Negara
Picture (Farah AF2) grabbed from artismelayu.net

5 species manusia sengal di Malaysia

2009-05-22T00:34:00.000-07:00

Aku tension sungguh dengan beberapa species manusia yang berlegar di muka bumi Allah ini. Kehadiran mereka dalam hidup ini seringkali membuat aku mencarut samada zahir atau batin (a$@#$R).

Manusia yang memandu dengan lambat di lane laju (lane paling kanan) di highway/jalan besar: Species ini memang banyak sungguh di Malaysia. Kalau dia drive kat residential area, jalan2 kecil tu tak kisah tapi ini highway kot. Takkan lane laju kat highway PLUS nak drive 60 km/j. Tak cukup dengan itu, bas/lori yang lembab dan panjang pun nak ambik lane laju juga. Dah tahu dia besar, guna jer lah lane belah kiri atau lane tengah.
Manusia yang memandu sungguh laju kat jalan2 kecil: Species ini pulak opposite of species nombor 1. Time kat residential area/jalan2 kecil....dia nak pergi laju gak. Orang dah drive reasonably fast (90-100 km/j untuk jalan sempit kira laju tuh) pun dia nak tailgate gak. Normally kalau orang tailgate aku dalam situasi begini, aku akan drive lagi slow.
Manusia yang suka mencilok masuk lane orang time lane dia bergerak lambat: Species ini suka tukar lane bila lane dia bergerak lambat. Kalau dia bagi signal, normally aku akan bagi dia masuk lane tapi kalau dia tak bagi, sori r bro....Wait your turn. Semua orang pun nak balik rumah gak.
Manusia yang potong queue di pasar malam: Pasar malam merupakan tempat kunjungan ramai jadi memang lar dia crowded. Bila dah nampak ada queue panjang kat stall, pandai2 lar queue. Jangan nak gi potong macam tuh jer. Penjaga stall pun kena pandai2 r jangan layan orang itu dan suruh dia queue. Tapi dia layan jugak orang tu dulu. Dua2 tak boleh harap.
Manusia yang lepak minum cendol/hisap rokok time khatib berkhutbah: Yang species 1-4 itu menyusahkan orang jer...tak disebut secara specific dalam Islam. Species ke-5 ni memang ada special mention dalam Quran. Patutnya, time khutbah Jumaat...orang dah kena duduk dalam masjid dengar khutbah. Peniaga2 pun tak reti2 gak. Time khatib dah nak bagi khutbah, hentikan lar aktiviti perniagaan kamu itu.
'Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Apabila diserukan azan (bang) untuk mengerjakan sembahyang pada hari Jumaat, maka segeralah kamu pergi (ke masjid) untuk mengingati Allah (dengan mengerjakan sembahyang jumaat) dan tinggalkanlah berjual-beli (pada saat itu); yang demikian adalah baik bagi kamu, jika kamu mengetahui (hakikat yang sebenarnya)' (62:9)

Banyak lagi jenis species manusia sengal nih sebenarnya. Species2 lain akan dihuraikan lain kali . Enough ranting for today.

FA Cup Final (April 25,2009)

2009-04-26T02:59:00.000-07:00

FA Cup Final - Kelantan VS Selangor
Venue: National Stadium, Bukit Jalil
Kick-off time: 25th April 2009, 8.45 PM

'Selangor held their nerves to win their fith FA Cup title 4-1 on penalties after a 1-1 draw with Kelantan after 120 minutes at the National Stadium in Bukit Jalil yesterday.' -NST

'LAWA DOH.LAWA DOH.' - Kelantan supporters

'Inilah barisan kita,Yang ikhlas berjuang. Siap sedia berkorban, Untuk ibu pertiwi!' - Selangor supporters

'Takpe...dah 40 tahun tunggu...tahun depan Kelantan menang r' - Mja on the loss and Kelantan's 40-year trophy drought

'Haha...alasan semata-mata' - Amir on the above statement

'Fuck you...BITCH!' - Numa getting back at Kelantan supporters after Selangor equalised in the 101st minute

Pictures

Kelantan fans

Tan Sri Khalid Ibrahim and Azmin among the VVIPs
Not just FRU involved...The FBI is also
in the house.

No empty seats in the Kelantan section

Selangor supporters make sure they are not outnumbered.

and the new FA Cup champions, Selangor with Tan Sri Khalid Ibrahim and Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim...

Chuck Norris facts

2008-12-17T18:36:00.000-08:00

Chuck Norris' calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.
When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.
Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.

Chuck Norris Facts

Paintball Royal Rumble (Dec 13,2008)

2008-12-14T05:29:00.000-08:00

Paintball Royal Rumble

Host: Rafie a.k.a Penyu Maut
Date: Saturday, December 13, 2008
Time: 9:00am - 5:00pm
Location: Tanamera Paintball Park
City/Town: Sungai Buloh, Malaysia

Stressed out cuz of exams or work? Then come on down and have a paintball royal rumble... Bring ur friends and enemies (if u wanna shoot 'em till they vomit), the more the merrier... Trying to get at least 80 people so we can shoot each other like a bunch of retards... Just kiddin...

Got this invitation on Facebook a month ago. Never played paintball before so decided to seize this opportunity. Didn't think that strafing, ducking for cover, taking aim, flanking and shooting enemies is difficult (just watch Rambo, Gerak Khas, Black Hawk Down, Bad Boys and you'll know what I mean) but this game changed my perception of that and makes me appreciate more the efforts/sacrifices of our brave men in uniform (kudos to PDRM, TDM, TUDM, TLDM and the other relevant acronyms I missed out). 24 people managed to turn up that day and even though the numbers were lesss than expected, the game was still super fun. Our paintball group for the day comprised of myself, the Axon friends (Awss, PL, Tuck Loon) and the Sunway comrades (Rafie, Jimin, Cheng, Ang, Farid, Numa and others). As expected, the Sunway comrades would oversleep on that day and we only reached Tanamera at around 1100 HRS.
After all of us got our equipment, we were briefed on the rules and regulations by a big tough guy called Dogg. He is one of the marshals at Tanamera. These marshals are the guys who would monitor and regulate/referee a game. Marshals and regulars can be easily distinguished by their army clothing. They would wear camouflage suits and army boots. One guy was even wearing a ghillie suit. His brother is also a regular. Strangely, he was wearing an olive green jubah and carrying around an AK-47. The regulars call him Osama bin Laden.
First two games were played were at Lake Placid. Lake Placid is an awesome map. With a lake surrounded by lots of palm trees that can be used for cover and considering its shape as well, there can be a lot of strategies devised.
Next two games were played out at Vietcong Village. This can be a very challenging map as one team has to climb uphill to reach the opposition's HQ (i.e. truck). Mosquitoes were in abundance in tihs map. BTW, paintball is a physically demanding sport. There is a lot of jumping, crawling, strafing and running involved. It can also be painful if one gets hit by a paintball, depending on one's pain threshold and location of impact. PL had bruising on her arm from getting hit by a pellet. Unfortunately, it started to raining heavily after four games and we had to go back then. Haha, came back to Rumah Sunway and found a lot of K.I.As (Killed In Action).

Pics from the day

Eii...we are famous!!! (Thanks, Far)

2008-12-02T22:12:00.000-08:00

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

And last but not least...

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Mai secawan?.....Cik mu!! (Kemensah 16/11)

2008-12-01T22:18:00.000-08:00

Went camping on Sunday (16/11/08) at the same old spot, Kemensah, again. Supposed to go on Saturday but Jimin had to go to Indonesia. On Saturday, went to Subang Parade with Mja to get supplies. Had to buy mess tin, tent, maggi, sardine, baked beans and bread. Jimin would get the drinking water the next day.

The original camping group comprised of me, Jimin, Mja, Jo, Fuad and Najeem. However, Jo and Fuad couldn't make it that day so we had two last-minute substitutes in the form of Cheng and Ang. Hehe...really last minute...

Scene 1 (Rumah Sunway)
Jimin: Ang, bangun, bangun!....jom gi camping.
Ang (half-asleep): Camping....bila?
Jimin: Sekarang!Sekarang!
Ang (still half-asleep): Jap...nak gi pack...

We departed from Sunway at 4.30pm. Had to go to Pantai Dalam to get camera and tripod from Mja's brother. Then, took the SMART tunnel to avoid jam along Jln Ampang. Along the way, we mulled over the idea of emulating the RADIX coffee advert on TV (Mai Secawan...) since we had a foreigner amongst us i.e. Najeem the Maldivian. First hiccup of the day came when a big nail/screw punctured Jimin's tyre. Luckily, the air was not leaking out at the time. We decided to take a gamble and just proceed to the campsite. Arrived at the parking area at Kemensah at around 5.50pm.

Haha, this is where it gets interesting. The weather forecast for Selangor that day was 'Thunderstorms in the evening, Rain at night' and although it stopped raining already when we were hiking to the campsite, the ground was made very slippery by the rain that subsided 30 minutes before. I made a mistake of wearing my old worn-out futsal shoe. Managed to walk okay at first but slipped 3-4 times later as the terrain got steeper. Fell into a puddle as well. Since the ground was very wet, leeches were in abundance. I got a total of 4 on my legs and 1 on my neck (me thinks it's a leech with Dracula genes). Everyone else had to pluck out leeches from their legs except Najeem. I guess Malaysian leeches find Maldivian blood unsavoury.

Around 15 minutes away from the campsite (approx. 7.10pm), it was already dark and getting darker. This was the time when everyone realized that it is good to bring a torchlight. You can barely see the ground you are stepping on at this time. LOL, luckily I remembered to bring my torchlight but forgot that the battery was low. Last-minute packing is never a good thing (sighs). A ratio of 6 people: 1 torchlight is very, very troublesome. Luckily, we managed to reach the campsite without getting lost but the trouble doesn't end there...

It's nearly pitch-dark when we arrived at the campside. Time to set up tent. However, turns out Jimin just bought his fancy new tent and no one (not even him) knows how to set it up. The tent is a very fancy Coleman tent that can actually accommodate 8++ people as opposed to the 6 mentioned in the brochure. There is a canopy/balcony/something sticking out at the front of the tent. After much fumbling and turning about the tent and inserting the tent poles into the wrong places, the tent crew managed to set it up......after 2 hours.

Luckily, the campfire crew managed better...managing to make two small fires to heat water to make Maggi. By the time the tent was set up, dinner was served (3 packs of Maggi Lontong + 2 Maggi Cups).

Regarding the title, it is always fun to have a nice hot drink at night when camping. Having a cuppa late at night in the rain is just satisfying. Then came the downer of the day, Mja couldn't find the stash of 3-in-1s. Must have dropped it along the way. This dampened our spirits to a certain extent that night considering the series of unfortunate events that have occured up to this point. In the end, we envisioned a revised version of the RADIX advert...

Scene 2(Inside tent in cold, wet weather)
Najeem: Mai Secawan...(big smile on face)
Amir, Mja, Jimin, Ang, Cheng: Mai Secawan??Cik mu!!!....Nah, lebih dari secawan aku bagi(throw the paper cups and plates to Najeem)

[P/S: 'Cik' in the context of this entry is a word originating from the Terengganu dialect. During old times (when you and I were not yet born), 'Cik' is used to refer to 'mother'. Nowadays, 'Cik mu' is often used as a derogatory/teasing term.]

Next day, cooked breakfast consisting of baked beans and sardine to be eaten with bread. Then, went mandi sungai...After that, time for group pic. Mja brought a tripod into the forest just for this. Packed and went back at around 11.00 AM. Luckily, we managed to avoid a downpour by 10-15 minutes. Ok, people...time to return to the 'civilised' world...

Random pics

(Leeches galore! Please do not EAT!!!)

(Mystical Parang: BEFORE and AFTER pics show that one is transformed into a Maldivian after using the parang)

Melaka VS Kelantan

2008-11-24T17:48:00.000-08:00

Jimin and Mja always have these mini skirmishes where they mock the other guy's home state. Boy...are they ever creative when it comes to this. Jimin is Malaccan and Mja is Kelantanese and the jokes they tend to make about each other are very hilarious. You have to actually be there to appreciate the humour of it. I thought that this entry will make a fine tribute to the never-ending series of the 'Melaka VS Kelantan' debate.

Round 1 (Location: Rumah Sunway)
Jimin: Ngko pernah dengar peribahasa Melayu, "Lembu punya susu, sapi dapat nama"...Apa version kontemporari?
Amir, Mja, Cheng: ............
Jimin: '"Selangor punya duit, Kelantan dapat pembangunan"'
Mja: 'WTF!!!'

Round 2 (Location: Rumah Sunway)
Mja: 'Ingat tak time kita belajar sejarah PMR dulu, ada Hang Tuah/Parameswara cakap time Kesultanan Melaka dulu..."Takkan Melayu Hilang Di Dunia"...'
Cheng: 'Kalau versi sekarang?'
Mja: '"Takkan Babi Hilang Di Melaka"'.

Reference: Kes Babi di Melaka (Utusan Malaysia)

Round 3 (Location: Rumah Sunway, tengah berucap ala2 YB)
Jimin: 'Kelantan bagaikan sauh yang menjunamkan Malaysia ke dalam lembah kemiskinan...'
Mja: 'Humph!'

Round 3 (Location: Kemensah camping, Tgh main teka-teki)
Jimin: 'Haaa...aku ada teka-teki. Orang mana yang tak suka pembangunan?'
Mja: 'Ark...kena lagi.'
Jimin: 'Haha...Kelantan...dah tiga penggal dah, Mja oii.'

Round 4 (Carls Jr., Sunway Pyramid, Mja wearing University of Korea t-shirt)
Jimin (looking at Mja's t-shirt): 'Eh...University of...oooo,Korea. Tu aku pelik tadi... tak nampak hujung tuh...ingatkan 'University of Kelantan'. Kelantan mana ada universiti.'

Round 5 (Carls Jr., Sunway Pyramid, Jimin unable to finish his triple mushroom and swiss burger)
Mja: 'Laaaa...ku sangkakan perut orang putih. Perut orang Melaka rupanya...'

P/S: For any Malaccan/Kelantanese people who got upset after reading this, chill...lighten up. We do this just to entertain ourselves. We have absolutely no issues against Malaccan or Kelantanese people and contrary to popular belief, we are not immature and brash individuals. We respect all Malaysian states. BTW, Melaka VS Kelantan is a non-issue. We all know Selangor tops all!!!

Genting Trip, 25th October

2008-11-19T00:58:00.000-08:00

Went to Genting on Friday, 25th October 2008 with Axon Colleagues. It's been a long time since I've been there (last time I went there was 20 years ago). The road leading up to Genting was so misty/foggy that you can't see beyond five metres. Luckily, Lee Wen is a reliable driver. The family suite at Theme Park Hotel where we stayed was quite big so there wasn't any need for me to use the sleeping bag I brought along.

In the evening, we went for the 'Motion Master' ride. For those unfamiliar with this 'ride', this involves participants sitting in seats that move in accordance with the movie on screen . Unfourtunately, I think we chose the wrong time because the short movie on screen was 'Alice In Wonderland' and the graphics are worse than Playstation (the first one). The seats also didn't move a lot since 'Alice in Wonderland' ain't really that scary to begin with (PG-13 below). Haih...never mind, just scream for the heck of it.

Watched 'Bangkok Dangerous' that night. The movie's summary:

Plot: Assassin for hire tries to leave his career. Things don't work out too well along the way. Transformation of character as Mr. Cage changes from a cold-blooded killer to a killer who's jiwang.
The Good: A lot of things blow up and a lot of people get shot in the movie, nice river drive-by shooting scene.
The Bad: Too many things get blown up, the ending is not so great.
The Ugly: Nicolas Cage's hairstyle

Next day, some of us went for the theme park rides. The Go-Kart's speed was albeit slow, I think anyone can outpace it. Everyone going for Go-Kart has to wear those shower caps. Maybe the helmets have mites or something. Got a variety of rollercoasters and rides in Genting but the queue for the good ones are too long (very lazy to queue, so long...afraid I will collapse).

Went back to KL at around 1600HRS. Lee Wen is a very good driver, most of the passengers managed to fall asleep.....zzzzzzzzzz.

Honourable mentions:

Timothy (booking the rooms and the spirit of the Genting trip)
Pui Leng (having a cool set of glasses/eating the most amount of Cheezels)
Ida (for sleeping during the movie)
Lee Wen (for being a Pemandu Berhemah)
Tuck Loon/WS (photographers)
Tong (being able to sleep soundly without any pillow or blanket)

Random Pics:

Seni Silat Setiabakti

2008-11-13T06:58:00.000-08:00

One of the Silat styles I am currently learning is Seni Silat Setiabakti. It is not as well known and famous compared to the other Silat styles around but this does not make it any less majestic or any less effective than others.
Seni Silat Setiabakti was founded by Guru Dahlan Karim. Guru Dahlan Karim studied more than ten styles of Malay Silat and the Setiabakti style comprises elements derived from these styles. Seni Silat Setiabakti teaches the three forms of Silat: self-defense, art and competitive Silat. Its motto is Ringkas, Mudah dan Berkesan (quick, simple and effective). This reflects the syllabus of Setiabakti as the combination of moves tends to be short and is aimed at inflicting a high degree of pain required to incapacitate/disable an attacker.

The Pukulan Buah Melaka and Tongkat techniques in Setiabakti are the techniques which distinguish Silat Setiabakti from its peers. Pukulan Buah Melaka is a series of hand-to-hand combat techniques used for attack and defence which are highly effective and overwhelmingly unpredictable from an assailant's perspective. The Tongkat technique comprises of attack and defence combinations using a stick of around 1 metre long. It can be used against armed and unarmed assailants.
The meaning behind the name Setiabakti is derived from Setia (loyal) and Bakti (loyal devotion/dedication). Setia implies loyalty to oneself, family, community, religion and homeland while Bakti implies dedication of oneself to his family, community, religion and homeland. The keris in the logo reflects that this style of Silat is one of the Malay Silat styles. The two circles represent a shield which symbolizes self-defense. The logo is in white to reflect goodness.
Seni Silat Setiabakti stands out as one very effective Silat style. I would recommend it for anyone wishing to learn Silat or anyone who just wants to learn self-defence.

(L-R: Amir, Jimin, Abg Lan, Guru Dahlan Karim)

Blood suckers...

2008-11-03T20:39:00.000-08:00

Since people around me are mulling over the prospect of going to Sekeping Serendah to be closer to nature, I think it is appropriate that they get familiar with a blood-sucking creature(not Pontianak) that they will definitely encounter in the jungle: the Leech.

There are a variety of leeches all over the world. Some have jaws with teeth, some don't. A leech attaches itself to you and will stay attached until it has become kenyang of your blood. They inject an anti-coagulant so the bites still bleed even though the leech is removed.
Here are some possible tips (especially for PLK and DT) on how to make your encounter with the leech less unpleasant:

Don't swallow or chew any leeches that you find. According to the US Army field manual,
'Swallowed or eaten, leeches can be a great hazard. It is therefore essential to treat water from questionable sources by boiling or using chemical water treatments. Survivors have developed severe infections from wounds inside the throat or nose when sores from swallowed leeches became infected.'
Use fingernail to interrupt the leech sucking on you and then flick it away.
Use lighter, lit cigarette, vinegar, insect repellent , teh tarik from any mamak stall or any other appropriate substance on the leech. It will cause the leech to detach. (may be less medically advisable to use this method).
Use anti-leech socks.
Just let it suck till it is kenyang.

To sum up, the leech is another creature that we have decided to type-cast as disgusting, vile and repulsive. However, we should also empathize with it. Whenever they see our legs/arms/ankles....they see food. Plus, they don't really need that much of our blood in order to get satiated. So, I urge all of us to reconsider our draconian and barbaric attitude towards these creatures of the jungle. We need more love in this world....

References:

US Army Field Manual FM 3-05.70 : Dangerous Animals

Wikipedia: Leech

Kemensah Camping Trip, 26th July

2008-10-28T06:29:00.000-07:00

Went camping with the silat group members (Sunway) to Kemensah. The participants comprised me, Abg Lan, Jimin, Ang, Eddy, Tahir, Aral and a few juniors whom I am not so familiar with.
Unknown to many KL-ites, there is a great camping spot near the heart of the city centre. One only has to drive a few kilometres beyond Zoo Negara to reach Kemensah. There are a few camps/chalets along the road which attract families looking for a nice weekend out but for campers and hikers, I would suggest that they venture deeper. 45 minutes walk from Institut Budaya Melayu Selangor (at the end of Jln Taman Zooview) , one can find a waterfall and a great camping spot.

We set off from Sunway at around 11.30 am in two cars. Another car was to arrive later that evening. I was expected to lead the group but it's been two years since I last went to Kemensah so it became a case of the blind leading the blind. We arrived at Institut Budaya Melayu Selangor at 1 pm. From this point, we had to walk for 45 minutes. I asked the security guards manning the booth there for directions to the waterfall. Each one gave me a different set of instructions so I decided to to use the directions given by the most senior among the two guards. Luckily, the guy was right.

Leeches are part of the package when it comes to camping in tropical wet areas and since it was raining a few hours before, you can see tonnes of them along the way. Aaah, nevermind, I'd already gotten used to them. Plus, I brought a lighter and a bottle of multipurpose liquid to get rid of them. Easiest thing to do is to just ask the guy walking behind to keep an eye out for you or you can just spread the end of your pants into your socks. We reached the campsite and set up tents and small fire. Then, we all went mandi sungai/air terjun.........Woohoo.

At night, we barbequed burger and sausages, cooked Maggi and drank Rooibos Tea + Coke. Funny that in normal situations, people won't even look at Maggi but in the wilderness, people will surround you like vultures around a carcass, just waiting to munch on your bowl of Maggi.

The next morning, Jimin conducted silat training teaching them blocking drills and stick combat fundamentals while I practised knife throwing with Abg Lan (a lot of trees around for target practice). After that, we all mandi sungai again then packed up and went back. Hmmm, Kemensah Waterfall....I'd definitely recommend the place for anyone looking for an outdoor adventure and unwilling to go out of Selangor/KL.